Head wig

In Identity and Culture class we watched a movie called "Hedwig and the Angry Inch" which was as musical movie about a transvestite who made it big singing, and took on a different identity so that he could marry this other guy. I find the concept of what to call Hedwig to be veryh confusing because he was born as a man, but through operations he basically became a woman, yet he is still a man. I don't want to call Hedwig an "it" because that sounds so derogatory and mean. It was his choice to make the switch and I don't have a problem with that. The actual character of Hedwig in the movie was played by a man, but his lover was played by a woman. The kissing scene seemed a bit awkward in the movie because it was two guys but in actuality it was a man and a woman. So what made the scene weird? the hair? the makeup? Anyway, I am quite confused as to what to think about this movie, because the theme was so different, but I found the movie to be quite humorous at times, and the singing was really good. Did the wig and the mustache make the woman who played his lover manly therefore making the scenario weird? I just felt really confused after watching this movie.